Don't Tread On Me, Shepard
by GodBlessAll50
Summary: Sergeant John Washington was just an average guy, until he is selected to be cryogenically frozen by the government to help humanity against the Reapers. Is he up to the task? And can he find love along the way?
1. The American Way

Don't Tread On Me, Shepard

Chapter One: The American Way

Hello. My name is Sergeant John Coolidge Washington and I am an American. Damn proud of it too. I joined the US MC the moment I could hold a gun. My dad was the best general of his time. You may have heard of General Patton but I know him as Dad. My scores on all the recruit tests were so outstanding they instantly promoted me to Sergeant much to the jealousy of my peers. Especially Private Josef Osama Castro. He is the most despised soldier in the US army. I suspect he's a Communist spy and I think he will be thrown out any day now. After all, I am General Patton's son. I go to church every Sunday and pray to God(Not mass, I'm not one of those Catholic pussies)

Josef sat on the nearby wall, on his own of course, and stared at John who was doing pull-ups in the nearby tent. Everyone cheered him on and Josef sighed. If only my father wasn't Fidel Castro he thought. I wish I didn't have to be a spy. I look across at John and his crew-cut blonde hair shines in the bright sunlight. His rippiling biceps flex as he lifts himself up the bar. His grey vest is stained with sweat and is ripping from the weight of the man within.(No slash here btw. certainly no gay slash anyway)

His perfectly tanned skin makes all the FEmale soldiers get lady boners(or whatever God gave them instead).

"Come on, John! You can do it!" yelled Richard Kennedy, John's best friend since they were children. John sometimes wished he could have Richard's father, George Bush Sr. His brother George was pretty fun too.

Commander Armstrong came up and said, "ALRIGHT, MAGGOTS! MOVE IT TO YOUR STATIONS!" Everyone ran away except for John, who was still doing exercise.

"John, could you please stop your exercise for a moment?" Everyone was always nice to me because of my dad but I told them to treat me like a normal American soldier.

John got down and saluted the commander. Meanwhile, Josef too out his spy camera and began spying on them.

"Please come with me, John."

John followed the commander and Josef sneakily followed them both.

John was taken to a tent that he reckognised. The Food Hall. The pictures of famous presidents were hung on the walls. John saluted all of them as he went by. He could have sworn the picture of Patton winked at him. Josef was still following sneakily. Patton scowled at him and Josef looked away in fright.

Finally, they came to the picture of the current president, Barack Obama. John didn't like him but saluted anyway. The commander said, "God Bless The United States" and a door opened. The commander and John entered. John turned around. He could've sworn he heard someone. Josef slipped through sneakily before the door closed.

"Damn immigrants." said the Obama picture.

John followed the commander through the dark tunnels. He wasn't scared because he knew he was on American soil. Eventually, they came to a room with loads of cryo pods.

The commander walked up to one and told John to get in.

"But why?" asked John.

"We have to continue the Patton line for the future. Any female in the future will want you, buddy."

Meanwhile, Josef was sneaking into another cryo-pod. He lay next to Thomas Jefferson as he went into stasis.(Yes, he's going to be the evil guy!)

"God bless you, sir." John saluted to his commander one last time.

"And god bless the USA." replied the Commander before the cryo pod shut and John fell asleep and woke up again instantly to a man with a grizzled beard looking over him.

"Wake up. The Reapers are here."

**Authors Note: Yes, I have tamepered with the ME universe a bit but it shouldn't be noticeable! I have played all the ME games as Lance Shepard and he will be appearing in the next one. I romanced Ashley, then Tali and finally Liara. Like a stud ;)**

**Until the next time.**

**-God Bless the USA**

**You can e-mail me at **** or see me on twitter at ****/#!/GodBlessAll50**** or on Facebook at .?id=100003685159899**


	2. The Future of America

-Shepard wakes up MR AMERICA to warn him about the Repears

-Mr America and Shepard have to run across to the Normandy through Unspecifiedastan. They fight lots of husks and have to run from a REAPER OH NOEZ

-Shepard tells Mr America that he is IN THE FUTURE

**Chapter Two: The Future of America**

**(Sorry this took so long, Larson just HAD to see the Hunger Games again. Anyway, here it is! The next chapter!)**

**(Oh, and stay tuned for my opinion on the ME3 endings)**

"I'm sorry, what?" muttered John, still drowsy from the stasis.

"There's no time to explain! We've gotta move!" yelled Lance, pulling John out of the pod. Normally, John would have broken the guys neck but he was still drowsy from the stasis.

"Take this and let's get of here!" yelled Lancem, throwing a strange rifle to John. "It's a Lancer."

"I know. I was selected to field-test them back when it was a prototype. Me and Rich-." The name of John's friend froze on his lips and he had to hold himself back from crying.

"We've all known lost, Sergeant. Now, come on!"

As they ran, John asked, "Wait, what did you mean by the Reapers are here?" John's question was answered as they emerged blinking into the sunlight. On there horizon were the massive metal ships that towered over everything.

"Oh, shit! They're already here! Come on!" Lance yelled as they ran across the battlefield. "Joker, I need a pick-up now! I DON'T GIVE A SHIT! NOW, MOREAU!"

Meanwhile, one of the Reapers hit the electric wires that gave power to the cryo-pods and Josef jumped out. He looked around a the place he was in. He ran out of the compund and was even more shocked by the Reapers than John was. He caught sight of John and another man in armor fighting together. He was about to call out to him but then a sack blacked out his vision and suddenly he was unconcious.

John's thermal clip was running out, so he pulled out the combat knife and started hacking away the husks.

"Sometimes, bullets are just too slow, Commander!" grinned John to the confused Shepard.

Finally, the Normandy arrived and Shepard told John to get in.

"How do I know I can trust you?"

Shepard sighed and said, "You are Sergeant John Patton, son of General Patton. You were cryogenically frozen in 2012 to help us defend against the Reapers and are Priority One for the Alliance at the moment. Also, I'm the only person you can trust."

John sighed and stepped onto the Normandy and watched as the Reapers destroyed his beloeved planet.

"I'm coming back." he whispered as the Normandy bay doors closed.

**So, my opinion on the ME3 endings:**

**If you don't like it, don't buy it. Bioware have the right to create whatever they want but you don't have to buy it. Stop whining just because it wasn't your 'perfect ending' where everybody survived. YOU CANT ALWAYS SURVIVE. This is isn't Call of Duty. I personally applaude Bioware on the work of art they have produced and anybody who dosen't like it can just go away.**

**Can't wait for Mass Effect 4 personally!**

**Oh and BTW wont be updating for a while because I'm going to the UK. See if any of you Brits can see me in London! **

**Please review!**

**-God Bless.**


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